Why Self-Driving Cars Aren’t Meeting the Hype
- Catherine Potter
- Jun 19
- 3 min read
Updated: Jun 26
Automated vehicles sound great on paper - better fuel efficiency, smoother traffic flow, fewer accidents, smarter navigation, and best of all, reduced human error. We’re talking no human input whatsoever - and let’s face it, most people can’t even parallel park on a good day. I mean, what’s not to like?
In an increasingly busy world, automated anything makes life sound easier, right? Yet, perhaps we should heed the not-so-subtle warning from the 1990 film Total Recall, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. After a shootout, Arnie’s character Quaid jumps into a less-than-ideal getaway vehicle - a ‘Johnny Cab’. This robot-operated taxi comes complete with a humanoid animatronic driver. Quaid frantically yells his destination but fails to use the correct voice command, so the cab doesn’t budge. Frustrated, and with the shooters closing in, he rips the robotic driver out of the seat and takes the wheel himself.
As the car crashes, the robot’s voice calmly says, "Please fasten your seatbelt…" and then, "We hope you enjoyed the ride!" - right before the cab explodes.
But wait - was this some kind of Back to the Future–style predictive programming, warning us that self-driving cars aren’t all they’re cracked up to be? Can you really take the driver out of the car, hand over your safety, and just hope there’s not a glitch in the Matrix? Can we seriously trust code over control - or is it time to hit the handbrake?
Elon, Waymo & The Ride to Nowhere
I have questions. Leading the hype around driverless cars is everyone’s favourite cowboy-slash-tech messiah, Elon Musk, and his fleet of Teslas. Yes, the guy who wants to drive your car, colonise Mars, and live-tweet the whole thing. But the very man behind this so-called game-changer has reportedly just cost Tesla over $10 billion due to a self-driving hardware shortfall.
Now, call me a sceptic, but if Elon’s promised “full self-driving” hardware — originally hyped back in 2016 - now needs a multi-billion-dollar upgrade, it begs the question: have we all been taken for a ride?
One recent real-life Johnny Cab-style experience in Arizona left passenger Mike Johns literally spinning in circles - and asking the hard questions, too. Johns booked a Waymo driverless taxi to get to the airport, but thanks to a system glitch, he ended up trapped in the car, looping helplessly around a car park. He filmed the chaos in a video that quickly went viral. And while there were no assassins chasing him and no animatronic driver to yank out à la Quaid, he was still effectively held hostage - a passenger in a car that told him to stay calm, carry on, and “refer to the Waymo app” in order to regain control of both the vehicle and, arguably, his life.
Seems Waymo - who is currently scaling one city at a time - still has a way to go. The company recalled more than 600 cars in 2024 after one smacked straight into a street pole.
As Johns put it best: “We’re all part of a paid experiment. At the end of the day, they’re fixing it as they go, per city. And that’s a problem.”
Well, spray paint me orange and call me Donald Trump…
Mission Aborted: Apple, GM & The Human Cost
Turns out, many who’ve thrown their hat in the driverless car ring have since aborted mission.
Apple’s giant Project Titan - their secretive self-driving car effort - burned through $10 billion and a team of 2,000 engineers from Tesla, Porsche, even NASA, only to be scrapped in early 2024, citing leadership challenges and internal disagreements.
And then there’s the GM Cruise crash. Once a front-runner in the driverless game, GM’s Cruise was halted after an incident in October 2023, when one of its vehicles hit and dragged a pedestrian for 20 feet. Public outrage followed, regulators stepped in, and by December, GM had also shut up shop.
I could go on - but suffice to say, there’s a theme here. And I have a word count… and a life.
So, Where To From Here?
Sure, the idea of getting from A to B without dodging pedestrians, oncoming traffic, or the odd rogue deer sounds great in theory. But let’s be honest - there’s still plenty of room for error, whether it’s humans or AI behind the wheel.
Perhaps we should just park it for now and keep enjoying the driving experience. Because the truth is, yes - being a driver in life comes with its challenges, but that’s part of the game. And if you’re not the one making the decisions to swerve or hit the pedal, you’re just a bystander - and that’s not playing to win.
Give me my autonomy any day.
Comments